PROVERBS

Lesson 4: Man’s Relationship with his fellowman

"He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fool shall be destroyed." –Prov. 13:20

The Power of Influence

Warnings about Evil Influences. "Enter not into the path of the wicked, and go not in the way of evil men. Avoid it, pass not by it, turn from it, and pass away" (4:14-15). Wisdom can give you the power to stay away from those who would lead you down a wrong path (2:10-16).

A Worthwhile Influence. "Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right" (20:11). Be conscious of how association with good people can influence you positively (2:20; 13:20). And recognize how your influence may affect others (22:1; 25:26). A man that would seek to separate himself entirely is acting foolishly – "He who separates himself seeks his own desire, he quarrels against all sound wisdom" (18:1, NASV).

Friendship: Proverbs reminds us of the great value of godly friends and worthwhile companions. "A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity" (17:17). "Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend" (27:17). "Thine own friend, and thy father's friend, forsake not" (27:10).

The Counsel of Friends. Being a friend sometimes means telling a person what they really need to hear. "Open rebuke is better than secret love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man's friend by hearty counsel" (27:5,6,9).

Friendship is Aided by Common Courtesy. The wise man suggests that gifts may accomplish more than we ever dreamed in making and keeping friends (17:8; 18:16; 19:6; 21:14). Such thoughtfulness is always appreciated. We are also told that while association with friends and neighbors is a fine thing, we ought to be considerate and not overstay our welcome – "Withdraw thy foot from thy neighbour's house; lest he be weary of thee, and so hate thee" (25:17). Even nice things done with obnoxious spirit can strain friendship (27:14).

Caution About Friends. "A man of many friends comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother" (18:24 – NASV). The popular person with many friends may be ruined by their association or by their bad advice. Such are often "fair weather friends", but a person is richly blessed when they have a true friend that is there for them in good times and bad.

Proper Respect For Others

This is stated in both positive and negative form: " Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hand to do it.

Say not unto thy neighbour, Go, and come again, and to morrow I will give; when thou hast it by thee. Devise not evil against thy neighbour, seeing he dwelleth securely by thee" (3:27-29). This includes respect for their life (1:11-12,16,19; 6:16,17) and respect for their property (1:13-14,19; 22:22,23; 24:15). We are encouraged to have honest dealings with others (26:18,19; 24:28).

The Destructive Nature of Strife

Wise and righteous people should do their best to avoid strife. "Strive not with a man without cause, if he have done thee no harm" (3:30). "Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man, but any fool will quarrel" (20:3). "The beginning of strife is as when one letteth out water: therefore leave off contention, before it be meddled with" (17:14). Proverbs suggests several steps to help avoid strife:

Remember that God hates the act of sowing discord among brethren (6:16-19). Once we have stirred up hard feelings, it is often difficult to overcome – "A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle" (18:19).

Your Attitude Towards an Enemy

Proverbs makes it clear that wise and righteous people must even be concerned about how they act towards their enemies. "Say not thou, I will recompense evil; but wait on the LORD, and he shall save thee" (20:22). "Rejoice not when thine enemy falleth, and let not thine heart be glad when he stumbleth: Lest the LORD see it, and it displease him, and he turn away his wrath from him" (24:17,18). "Say not, I will do so to him as he hath done to me: I will render to the man according to his work" (24:29). "If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink: For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the LORD shall reward thee" (25:21,22).

Questions:

1.Name some of the problems that Proverbs mentions that might  arise through  the influence of evil companions.

           2. Why should we not envy sinners (23:17; 24:1,2)?

            3. Explain what Proverbs 27:17 means?

            4. Define the word "strife".

            5. Give some New Testament passages that teach similar thoughts as those made about how               strife can be avoided.

                      6. Do righteous people have enemies? If so, why?

[Introduction to Proverbs] 
[Lesson 1-The Value of Wisdom]     [Lesson 2-What it Means to be a Fool]  
[Lesson 3- Relationship with God]  [Lesson 5- Marriage Relationship]
[Lesson 6-Problem of Adultery]  [Lesson 7- Parent/Child Relationship]
[Lesson 8-Government ] [Lesson 9 - Money_Labor.html]
[Lesson 10-Self-Control]   [Lesson 11-Rewards/Consequences]

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Page last updated: March 03, 2003